Monday, March 01, 2010

Read Write Poem Prompt #116

At midnight
The carnival
fell to bed.
The ferris wheel
driver slumped
leg dangly over the
side of a faded
red car.
The mirror maze
man draped curtains
over twenty four
panes of glass
then another over
himself and lay
on the floor
to sleep.
In the haunted
house the ghouls
hushed their howling
and hung blinking
in the half light.

Under the even
ticking of a rusting
sky clock, the
silhouette of a
small girl with
candy floss in her
hand chased a
balloon through
the carnival's


Mariana Isara said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Derrick said...

I enjoyed this stroll through the sleeping carnival and particularly the girl with candy floss in her hair.

Derrick said...

Sorry, for "hair" read "hand"!!

Cynthia Short said...

Quite nice descriptions of a dreamlike, slightly eerie world.

Paul Oakley said...

I love the image of the carnie draping the mirrors, elsewhere a death ritual, and then draping himself, shroudlike, for sleep. The link of death and day's end is so comfortable here. Nice!

poemblaze said...

great poem.

Raven's Wing Poetry said...

Your piece has a dream-like quality to it (appropriate, since it's a carnival at midnight). I especially love your image of the mirror maze man draping the cloth over the mirrors and himself. Your last stanza suggests to me a little that the girl is a ghost. Or maybe that's how I'm reading it. Absolutely beautiful.


rob kistner said...

Yes Yes Yes -- this was wonderfully hallucinatory and transcendent. After reading it several times, I wish it had even more stanzas... ;)


Rob said...

Surreal...highly enjoyable...

Heather said...

Wow, such strong imagery! Immediately I knew exactly where we were, the time of day... There's also a great sense of place. Outstanding.

briarcat said...

Nicely done. I like the little girl

Ezekiels_Daughter said...

I liked the image of a carnival falling into sleep in its own unique manner. I haven't the slightest idea wat candy floss is. Another task for google....

flaubert said...

Love the imagery in this poem!
Nice job with this week's prompt.


Tumblewords: said...

Great imagery. It brings forth memories of haunted places and mirrors of distortion - a smoky dream.

Joyce Ellen Davis said...

Reminds me of a carnival I went to once where they let me touch the leg of the man turned to stone, where I saw a mummified baby.

Nice work.