A connection between my Addison's and Inflammation?

Ok, so this is talking about cortisol in the sense of the body becoming resistant to it, but I think there are interesting correlations. If the body's inability to use cortisol leads to inflammation then perhaps too low levels of cortisol could have a similar response. In other words, perhaps I need to up my medication when I'm injured after all.

Original post and podcast here.

Concrete evidence linking chronic stress to inflammation and modern disease

Chris Kresser: All right, so the first study is right in line with the April Best Your Stress Challenge, and if you haven’t heard of this, go check out my blog, ChrisKresser.com. You now, there are a lot of 30-day diet challenges. There’s the Whole30, and there’s the Personal Paleo Code, my program where we ask people to give the Paleo diet a try for 30 days and give it that chance to change their lives and make a big difference in their health. But I’ve talked a lot about the importance of stress management and improving stress tolerance and mitigating the impacts of the stress that we can’t get rid of on our life, so I thought it would be a good idea to spend April doing a 30-day Best Your Stress Challenge. So, the idea is to apply that same concept of a 30-day diet challenge to stress management, and I wrote a post about this a little while back, I think, on March 30 and offered some ideas for what people can do to manage their stress throughout the month of April and just to make a commitment and preferably a small, fairly manageable one because oftentimes we have a tendency to commit to more than we can do and then we don’t follow through, so just setting a small goal, like meditating for 10 minutes in the morning or doing a deep relaxation exercise every afternoon or taking a walk in the woods or on the beach — whatever it is that helps you manage your stress — and doing that throughout the whole month of April and seeing how that improves your health overall.

So, the other day, I saw a new study with the title Chronic stress, glucocorticoid receptor resistance, inflammation, and disease risk, and since I’ve been thinking a lot about stress and the effects of stress on disease, I thought it would be a good idea to talk a little bit about this study because it’s really interesting, and it takes our traditional concept of how stress contributes to disease and kinda turns it on its head. It’s some relatively new information. I’ve seen a few other studies with a similar theme, and if anything, it just reinforces what we’ve been talking about in terms of the connection between stress and disease and the importance of managing stress and either reducing the symptoms of a disease that we already have or helping to cure it entirely or preventing the risk of acquiring a new disease. So, stress is associated with just about every modern disease that you can name, from depression to cardiovascular disease to type 2 diabetes to autoimmune conditions like rheumatoid arthritis and Crohn’s disease and multiple sclerosis to upper respiratory infections and even the common cold. And up until pretty recently and still now, I think, most people think that stress causes disease by dysregulating the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis, but this notion that stress acts simply by elevating cortisol levels is becoming less and less likely, at least in the current scientific literature. So, what this new paper and other recent papers suggest is that it’s actually the sensitivity of cells or the target tissue to cortisol, not absolute levels of cortisol that’s most important. So, glucocorticoid resistance, which is a decrease in sensitivity of immune cells to glucocorticoid hormones like cortisol, makes it more difficult to shut off the inflammatory response. So, let me break that down. When you’re insulin resistant, you’re producing enough insulin, but your cells are resistant to the effects of insulin, so it’s like insulin’s knocking on the door, but nobody’s inside or whoever’s inside isn’t listening, so the door doesn’t get open, and insulin can’t perform its function. The same is true with leptin resistance, and there’s even thyroid hormone resistance where thyroid hormone can’t activate the cellular receptors for thyroid hormone, so even though there’s plenty of thyroid hormone circulating around, you experience all the signs and symptoms of hypothyroidism because thyroid hormone isn’t affecting the receptor.

So, this study and others like it suggest that there’s a similar phenomenon with cortisol resistance. So, it’s not high levels of cortisol, per se, that are contributing to an increased susceptibility of disease, but it’s instead the insensitivity of cellular receptors to cortisol that’s the problem, because one of cortisol’s jobs is to turn off the inflammatory response once it gets started. So, let’s say you catch a cold or you get a cut or you have some kind of injury or illness, and inflammation is the natural response to that. Inflammation is not all bad. In an acute setting, inflammation is what helps us to heal. The problem happens when inflammation doesn’t get turned off appropriately, and then it just kinda runs wild and you get chronic inflammation, and it’s that chronic inflammation that is a risk factor for disease, not the acute inflammation that helps us to heal. So, in a normal functioning person, what would happen is that you’d get a cold or you’d get some kind of injury or acute condition that causes inflammation, and then the glucocorticoids, like cortisol, are produced and they turn off the inflammatory response by activating the glucocorticoid receptors. So, what these researchers have found is that people who are under chronic stress, that doesn’t work right. The cortisol gets secreted, but it doesn’t activate the receptors, and then you get a runaway inflammatory response. And this has been shown in other studies. They’ve found that cortisol resistance is present in spouses of brain cancer patients, in parents of children with cancer, and in people that are very lonely, and all of those populations are known to be experiencing significant stress.

So, in this study, the researchers used, I think, a pretty ingenious model to demonstrate this effect. I mean, it’s well established that chronic stress increases the susceptibility to the common cold and upper respiratory infections, as I mentioned earlier. So, the researchers actually did two studies in one. The first one was meant to determine whether stress causes cortisol resistance and whether people with cortisol resistance are more likely to develop a common cold in the first place. And then the second one was meant to determine whether cortisol resistance could predict the amount of local inflammation in the nose, for example, in response to a viral infection. So what they did is they actually purposely infected people with a virus, a rhinovirus that causes the common cold and respiratory infection, and as expected in the first study, the results did show that exposure to stress increased cortisol resistance, and in the control group they found that exposure to an acute stressor was associated with white blood cell count, but in the group that was under chronic stress there was no association. So, in other words, what should happen is that when you’re exposed to a stressor, as I mentioned, cortisol should turn off the inflammatory response and reduce the white blood cell count, but that didn’t happen in people that were under chronic stress and had cortisol resistance.

In the second study, they found a correlation between cortisol resistance and the levels of various proinflammatory cytokines locally, like interleukin-6 and TNF-alpha. And then they also saw a decreased sensitivity of white blood cells to the inhibitory effects of cortisol, like we’ve been talking about. So, in other words, when you’re stressed out, the immune system cannot turn off the inflammatory response like it’s supposed to, and then you’re more likely not only to get sick in the first place, but you’re more likely to stay sick for longer because that inflammatory process doesn’t get inhibited. So, the interesting thing also about this study is that there was no correlation between actual cortisol levels, like circulating cortisol levels, and disease risk or inflammation. So, it seems like it’s the cellular receptivity to cortisol, the sensitivity of the receptors to the actions of cortisol, that’s the most important, rather than the circulating levels of cortisol themselves. So, I thought that was pretty interesting, and it may not change things from from an end-user perspective too much because the idea is still that you want to take steps to manage your stress, but for me, every study I see like this is just another affirmation of the importance of stress management, and I see it in my work with my patients, I see it in my own life and my own experience, and people might be getting tired of hearing me talk about it, but I’m gonna keep talking about it because I thinks it’s kinda the elephant in the room in a lot of cases. In my patient population, I think I can pretty safely say that people who are taking active steps to manage their stress have significantly better clinical outcomes than people who don’t, and I just think it’s a much bigger contributor to the whole disease process than most of us really realize.

Steve Wright: That’s pretty insightful, man. And I thinks it’s awesome that we’re getting more data on what the problem is because you do hear a lot about, well, you’re not totally stressed out or you can go do another CrossFit workout as long as your cortisol isn’t over 20 or something like that.

Chris Kresser: Yeah.

Steve Wright: So, this is cool to have a new model. Now, do you know if, for instance, because we’re a little bit better at measuring insulin resistance and leptin resistance, are the three correlated? So, if I’m insulin resistant, I’m likely leptin resistant or I am leptin resistant. Am I also cortisol resistant then?

Chris Kresser: I don’t know what the exact relationship between all of those would be, but I certainly think that HPA axis dysregulation can contribute in some way to leptin and insulin resistance and probably vice versa. I wish there was a way of testing for cortisol resistance in the commercial setting. I don’t think there is. I think it’s only available in research settings. But what’s interesting about this study is that I think, like you said, the idea that we can just run an adrenal stress index or any kind of hormone profile where we measure cortisol, and if the person has normal cortisol we say: OK, you’re clear to do, you know, five CrossFit workouts a week. We can’t really make that assumption because that test is not gonna show cortisol resistance in the white blood cells. I think ultimately just paying attention to symptoms is a pretty good guide because if you have this cortisol resistance pattern, you’re gonna have more difficulty recovering from workouts because that inflammatory response won’t get turned off. I mean, working out, especially lifting weights, but doing any kind of intense workout is basically like a controlled stimulation of inflammation. You’re breaking down tissue when you lift weights. You’re breaking down your muscle tissue, and the idea is that when it builds back, it builds back bigger and more able to deal with the next stressor, in that case, lifting weights. So, that works well if you give the body long enough to recover, if you give the body long enough to turn off that inflammation and then to start the anabolic process rather than the catabolic process of building the tissue back up. And if you’re a healthy person with no significant stress levels and you’re not dealing with any chronic inflammatory condition, that should happen fairly quickly and commensurately with the amount of exercise that you did. But if you’re dealing with chronic stress and you have cortisol resistance, here’s what’s gonna happen: You’ll do the intense workout, you break your tissue down, which is what happens and is the whole point, but the recovery process will be very, very slow, and the inflammation will persist. So, instead of taking one day or maybe two days to get back to baseline and then start building new tissue, stronger tissue, you’ll take several days to get back to baseline, or maybe you really never fully do get back to baseline. And then you do another intense workout, so then you break down more tissue and cause more inflammation, and then it’s a downhill slide from there. And I see this a lot in the CrossFit community, people who come to me who have been doing CrossFit. And this is not all people who do CrossFit. I’m talking about people who are under significant stress and who may be dealing with a chronic health challenge. But the fact is most of us in this modern world are under stress, and some of us are better at managing it than others, and some of us pay more attention to that than others, but I think this is a very real phenomenon and it’s not just affecting people who have kids with cancer or spouses with cancer or people who are socially isolated. It’s affecting all of us to some degree or another.

Steve Wright: Way to wrap that up. I think it’s important to keep learning about it.

Easter Adventures and More Medical Pondering

Oriental Bay, March 2012. Not a breath of wind.

So what's a girl to do when Easter throws up perfect weather here in Wellington? Don't forget, it's autumn in New Zealand, and Welly's not exactly known for its climate at the best of times. It was a very lacklustre summer, so it's been pleasant to be gifted an ideal autumn Easter break.

Devil's Gate, Southern Coast of Wellington

My next event is a trail half marathon this Saturday. It's a fairly flat course and mostly on forestry tracks, so not too technical. On Saturday I went out on my last long training run - two hours around the flat, gravelly and sandy trail out past Red Rocks. The first four or so kilometres are fairly straightforward, but then the trail deteriorates and is interspersed with big banks of gravelly rocks which have to be gingerly traversed, or deep sand which has to be waded through.

After Devil's Gate I was almost completely on my own. It was just me, the hills to my right, and the sea to my left. So incredibly beautiful and so remote-feeling despite being so close to my country's capital city. After about eight and a half kilometres the hills turned into a huge sand dune which begs for a repeat visit for some sliding. The road became deep sand. I turned around and plodded slowly back to the car park. On the way back I sort of lost interest and energy and it was not a negative split by any means.

Cooling my legs in the sea at the end of my run.

The lacklustre nature of this run concerned me in that it followed a week of absolute exhaustion. I had become a fan of the afternoon nap, and was cultivating a close relationship with the sofa. Even with the beautiful weather and free time I had lost my mojo and just wanted to sit around.

Was I prepared to let myself do that? Well, no. I decided to let the housework and gardening slide instead!

Looking from Red Rocks car park towards Pencarrow

On Sunday I went out for a road ride with a friend, Karen, and a new women's riding pack. We were scheduled to do an easy ride of the Bays here in Wellington - about two hours and mostly flat. I should have known I was in trouble. My friend and her riding partner have been training seriously for some big cycling events lately. Another girl has just come off Ironman training, and a couple of the others just looked very fit in general.

I coped easily while we were on the flat but got owned when we climbed the five kilometres to the top of Brooklyn Hill. Karen even came back looking for me. So embarrassing. I guess my legs were more tired from the day before than I'd thought, and I really need some more bike time!

The lower of the two Pencarrow lighthouses.

After yet another afternoon nap on Sunday I was up again for a mountainbike ride with my friend Julia. I was really feeling quite worn out by this stage, but I knew I was a faster rider than Julia so figured I could take it easy. We started from the car park at the end of Eastborne, on the opposite side of the harbour from the car park I'd run from on the Saturday.

This wasn't exactly hard core cycling. For the most part it's an easy ride on a four wheel drive track. It's only the last four or so kilometres which get a bit more technical as the track slowly peeters out. We finished up in gravelly sand at Baring Head, a popular rock climbing site. The land around Baring Head has recently been purchased from private ownership to be turned into public reserve. I'm planning to return to explore the trails inland, and the historic lighthouse and farm buildings. Such an amazing asset for the city.

We'd had what seemed like beautifully calm conditions on the way out, but it only seemed that way because of the stonking Northerly headwind we turned into on the way back. It was a total slog back to the car and I was really quite shattered by the time we finished. It was all I could do to get my bike into my car and drive home. I spent the afternoon getting off the sofa in short bursts to tick chores off my to-do list. All the same, I was feeling so lucky and grateful to be able to spend my weekend outdoors doing what I love.

Through the whole weekend (and most of last week) I'd had a headache, and by yesterday I was starting to worry that my surgery might have failed and that I'd soon be back in hospital again. I'd lost my appetite and all motivation, and last night's squad run was a non-event.

Then I looked at my calendar and realised it had been four months since my last B12 shot. Guess what I had this afternoon? Guess who feels a lot better already? Yes. I'm an idiot. Don't let me make that mistake again!

So - about that injury

Ok, so you may have picked up that I have just gotten over a shoulder injury. You may have even read that I didn't really do anything much to obtain that injury, but that it led to excruciating pain, much expenditure on physio and osteo treatment, and a recovery time that was perplexingly long. Now I've been running for what, six years? During that time I've had the full stable of runner injuries - ankles, knees, ITB issues, hip problems .... I've worked through them all. During that time I've also had the occasional neck or shoulder issue.

I won't pretend that my biomechanics are great. One of the benefits of my recent break from training has been the opportunity to have the osteo really work on my alignment. He's managed to get my hip and pelvis straightened up, with the odd result that I now stand with my left leg slightly bent. Go figure .... However even with all the manipulation there is a deeper issue that I've been dealing with for as long as I can remember, and that I had hints of even before I became a runner.

I am, to put it bluntly, tight. By that I mean that no matter where you touch me - be it my shoulder blade or my shin or my ankle - you will find a muscle in spasm. It doesn't matter how often I get a massage, how much yoga or how much stretching I do. For some reason my body insists on holding itself tense. In fact my osteo commented more than once when he was treating my shoulder that it was like my body was suffering some kind of reaction to traumatic stress. For the record - nothing more stressful than a little bit of weight gain has occurred around here of late.

In the midst of all the shoulder issues I decided I really needed to deal with the underlying problem. Herein lies my dilemma - my body doesn't function like most normal bodies. My adrenal glands don't work - or at least the outer cortex doesn't. I replace the cortisol, the aldosterone and the DHEA, but what else am I lacking that my body might need? Add in a hypoactive thyroid and pernicious anaemia, and who knows what my screwy hormones are doing, or not doing to me. I've increasingly come to believe that if I had a functioning endocrine system I wouldn't have half the problems I do have.

I have tried other solutions as well - for example I started taking Omega 3 supplements, because I don't eat fish so figured I'm probably lacking. They made no perceivable difference though. So what about my medications? I take a low dose of cortisol, but I don't think that's it. Well, perhaps it could be. Perhaps I could have tried upping my dose by 5mg or so a day just to see. I know I'm going to get nagged for this, but I couldn't bring myself to do so. It seems there's still a lingering nervousness about being on a higher dose than I 'might' need. Unfortunately I don't have ready access to a doctor to draw blood for me at regular intervals during the day, so I will never know for certain. What harm could trying an extra pill a day for a few weeks really do?

In my defence, I'm MUCH more likely to slip in an extra dose or two during my more intense workouts. I THINK it helps me recover, but there's that darn placebo effect to think of.

In the meantime I guess I'll keep doing what I do. It must be nearly time for my annual Endo consult, but the problem is that there's so little known about Addison's and endurance sports, and about the other hormones the adrenal glands produce that we don't bother about right now.

I just continue to hope that medical science continues in its current vein so that in a few years I'll be able to grow new glands and then I guess I'll know for sure!

Tussock Traverse - the Reprise

So I kinda left you hanging huh? Is anyone out there even still reading? The truth is, I messed my shoulder up really well back in January, and it's taken till now for me to be able to get back into my usual running/cycling/group training/yoga routine. Things got pretty dark there. Whole weeks went past when a simple flat mountain bike ride was too much, when I couldn't run and couldn't even imagine getting back on my road bike. Those were days when I would sit at my desk trying not to cry from the pain.

Let me remind you - I slept on my shoulder oddly in December, then did an upper body workout in mid-January. That was it. It took three months of weekly osteo and physio appointments, some dry needling and the occasional massage, to get things to where I am today - around 95% of normal. Between Tussock and now there's been a lot of mental anguish and several kilos of unwanted comfort eating and general sedentariness. I just couldn't face posting anything about my race.

But anyway - here is where I left you - early on the morning of the Tussock Traverse. As you can see, it was stunningly beautiful and rather cold.

(Sorry for the sideways photo - I couldn't figure out how to turn it around. This photo doesn't look steep but was in fact near the top of a killer two kilometre climb on a 4WD track).

After a long bath the night before the race, an early night and a sleeping pill, I woke, ate a fairly solid breakfast, and drove down to the village for a bus to the start. Of course, as is typical, I was there rather early, and got on the first bus. I sat next to a woman who wanted to chat, but I really just wanted to sit there quietly and collect my thoughts. To add to my discomfort, the bus was freezing cold. I had my merino jacket and a polyprop on over my running gear, but I was still shivering.

It wasn't much warmer when we finally got to the start line. I put my bag at the drop off and took my merino jacket off. Unfortunately we go there just as the walkers were leaving - half an hour late. That meant we got delayed by half an hour as well. Cue some major dithering. I put food in my hydration pack, took it out, put it back in again. I was lucky to have some fruit and a power bar in my drop bag, and that kept me from starving. Finally, right before we started, it got warm enough that I felt I could take my polyprop off.

(Not the start - this was near the end)

Tussock notoriously starts with a big climb up a 4WD track. Uphill is not my strength, but I'd spent plenty of time running Wellington's Tip Track, so I was confident I could handle it. As i was I still ended up near the back of the pack as we climbed. My goal was simply not to reach the top last. Mission accomplished, so far so good.

At the top of the climb we were directed down a steep rock scramble. I managed to regain a little ground here as I passed some women who were less confident on the downhill. From there the next 8 or so kilometres were rocky, and we were warned that most injuries occurred on this section of the trail. Once we reached the bottom of the hill we ran through a large valley. This section of the track was indeed a little more technical, but not as bad as some of the rooty trail I've run in Wellington. There wasn't really a defined trail here - instead we ran from marker post to post. There was a real trick to selecting the best path through the volcanic rock, and I could really appreciate how a course in rock hopping could be an advantage. In the end I thought I did quite well. I only came close to twisting my ankle once, about four kilometres in, but after a few metres it eased up and stopped hurting.

I really enjoyed that first ten kilometres. I found myself tagging along behind an older gentleman who had run the course several times before. He set a good pace and knew where he was going so I was happy to follow, particularly when the track became more sandy and started to wind through deep trenches. My friend was able to lead us either over or through these. He also led me down the side of some river valleys and up some steep sand dunes. However there was one problem with my new friend - he was wearing full length compression tights, and they were sitting halfway down his butt. So I was faced with the choice of leaving him behind or sitting behind and trying to avert my gaze.

In the end we reached a long sandy stretch - similar to running along a beach, and I left my friend behind. I kept expecting him to catch me up, but he never did. Kilometres 6ish to 10ish were beautiful. We were running through something like a Japanese garden - rock, sand and little clusters of alpine tussock and shrubs. I was feeling good at this point, took in a gel, and kept hydrated.

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(Flashback - the view from our rental accommodation)

At the race briefing we were told that the 10k marshall point was pretty much our only chance to pull out. I don't know whether that stuck in my head or what, but it caused me some significant mental anguish later in the course. There was nothing to say we were at 10k, just a marshall sitting in her tent and an injured running standing in a stream icing his ankle. I don't know what I expected - perhaps some medics? Anyhow, at about 11k the wheels majorly fell off. I found myself walking a lot and I felt hideous.

At around 12k I actually stopped, regrouped, sucked down another gel and drank a heap of fluid. I'm sad in some ways that I lost it here because the next 10k were probably the best for running. The trail became gently undulating, with gravel underfoot and boardwalks to carry us through the boggy bits.

I had never really set a goal other than to not come last, and I was aware that I was undertrained, so I let myself set a pace I was comfortable with. I alternated walking and running for the rest of the course. In other circumstances I would have been able to run the whole thing, but for whatever reason I was feeling a need to pace myself, so I wasn't going to beat myself up.

(The villa I booked for us to stay in - fabulous)

I ended up running the flat and the downhill, and walking the uphills. I started overtaking walkers! After about 15 or so kilometres I lost the dead feeling I'd had at 10k and started to feel good again. I felt good again to go chasing some of the other tail end runners. The relief of knowing I wasn't last on the course was immense.

(The startline)

In the race reports I'd read I remembered reading about seeing the Chateau then having to run away from it for another 6k. I don't know whether I was delirious or what, but I never saw the Chateau. Instead I got overtaken on a big climb onto a ridge by the runner I'd seen icing his ankle. He was strapped up and flying.

At the top of the ridge he was gone, and I was on my own. It appeared that I was supposed to turn left, but at this point the arrows started pointing in conflicting directions, and the distance markers started to read screwy as well. In the end it turned out I was reading the distance markers for the shorter run as well as the 26k. All the same, it was a relief to come across two marshalls directing me down a step set of steps to a river.

(Desert plateau - taken from the start line)

The last 5 to 6 kilometres were tantalisingly close to the start, and some of the most beautiful of the trail. We ran along the side of the river, past a waterfall and swimming hole, and past supportive tourist walkers. Some of the best marshalls were here - calling out enthusiastic support. I should have blitzed this seciton, but any time I got to anything remotely technical (rocky or rooty) I slowed right down. I was definitely having fun though.

Of course what went down eventually had to go back up, and I found myself climbing more stairs. I even overtook a male runner! The last 500 metres to a kilometre were back on an open gravel path, and uphill to the Chateau. I was convinced my Squad crew were going to be right there cheering me on, so I made myself stand upright, run and smile, as if I was fresh and feeling great.

In the end I ran across the finishline to see my supporters sitting around drinking beer and chatting, oblivious to my anticlimactic finish. I berated them a little then sat to gossip before Duck noticed I was cold and shivering again and we headed back home.

I ended up finishing right on the time that I thought I would. I wasn't even last! I'm confident that I can easily knock half an hour off that time, so I will be heading back again to do just that next year. In the end though I was just full of disbelief that I'd just gone out there and run (ok, run/walked) a fairly intense and remote 26k trail run. I was so incredibly proud of myself at that point! From someone who in 2004 was diagnosed with a potential lethal autoimmune disorder, someone who, two years earlier had had brain surgery which had left me with vision and balance issues, I'd become a true hard core adventurer. My achievement was just as noteworthy as that of the race leaders.

The aftermath, well, I later discovered I'd probably only drunk around one litre of liquids, and I'd only had a couple of gels. I went back to the villa, ate too many carbs, and drank a little too much cider. I developed a major migraine and was in bed by 8.30. I slept for over ten hours. I woke incredibly, uncomfortably sunburned, and still have a great 3/4 length tights tanline on the back of my calves. I also had a wicked bit of chafing on my neck from the hydration pack and a bright red forehead.

The next morning the weather had closed in so I was glad I hadn't brought my mountain bike with me after all. The cloud was dropping, the rain steady. Abandoning plans of a touristy slow trip home I was in my car and away by 9.30. My shoulder had felt fine while I was running, but the next day's drive home sent it into spasms which, as I noted above, took months to come right.

So yes, it's now March and I'm back discovering the trails, and realising that although I'm heavier again from what I was when I ran Tussock, I'm still thankfully quite fit. I've just signed up for the Xterra trail run series and the first is here on my home turf - Red Rocks. My goal now is to run all of the series, and the upcoming Waitarere half marathon. On top of that I also want to get out on my new old mountain bike regularly and start road riding with a mission again. By November I want to be near race weight (being able to do my morning small group training sessions again will help with that) and in prime bike fitness to have as good a chance as possible of going sub-six round Lake Taupo.

All that and I haven't even mentioned my new role at work or any of the other amazing things which have been going on around here. Guess I should really start posting more regularly huh?

I'm Back

Yes, I did one month in Europe. I ran the Budapest marathon (with a cold, in 30 degree temperatures). After two more glorious and indulgent weeks in Italy I came back home and I started training hard. Before Christmas I was doing three morning group training sessions a week, plus a PT session and evening runs and spin classes. On the weekend I was out running the trails and/or out on my bike. When Christmas came I kept running and cycling. The morning workouts at the gym stopped, but I was looking forward to starting up again when ....

About a month ago I injured my shoulder. It was silly. I slept on it funny, then I did a PT session, and then woke up the next morning in agony. All running and cycling and workouts in general stopped. I'd just completed an 18k trail run and was supposed to get in 22k in the lead up to a 26k run in National Park. It was all I could do not to burst into tears at my desk - the pain was so pervasive. There was no way I was running 22k.

I managed to fit in two more runs, and then it was race week. What to do - drop down to the 13k, which I knew I could complete comfortably, or be awesome and run 26? Everyone else in our group had dropped back to 13k. Would I feel happy if I did the same, or like I'd cheated myself?

Right up to the Wednesday before the race I was still second guessing myself, and then a few conversations with fellow runners got me thinking. Perhaps after all these years it was time to just throw my hat in the ring and trust myself that I had the physical and mental strength to do this thing. Perhaps it was time to take a chance. What was life without some risk?

I drove north, I walked into registration, and without even thinking about what I was doing I picked up my race packet for the 26k. It was on.

TBC.

One week till we leave for Europe

Three and a half weeks till the Budapest marathon.

The training's been going well. I ran 35k on Saturday, incorporating the Havelock North half marathon, and was playing beach cricket that afternoon. The travel plans took a while to come together thanks to both H and I being chronic procrastinators, but they're locked in now. Holland, London, Budapest, Italy.

This blog has been sadly neglected, but there will be lots to report on over the coming month!

Bashed by a Duck Again

Never let my dedication to my workouts be questioned. It was only a horrendous cold which kept me on the sofa last week. Unfortunately, although I don't get sick often, when I do I do it in style. Even more unfortunately, the cold coincided with the Wellington half marathon. Goodbye $55 worth of entry fees. At least I didn't spend another $45 on the t-shirt! I also missed my 'big Saturday', a 15k Squad run and the 5k XTERRA night run. I was extremely gutted to miss the night run, as I've really enjoyed the XTERRA series this year. I still owe a race report from the third event out at Catchpool.

I tested my return to semi-wellness on Monday night with a wheezy, snotty flat 7.5k round the waterfront. I felt better than I'd expected, if somewhat slow. I followed that up with RPM on Tuesday night, and made it a point to keep the dial locked in. I was certainly feeling the burn by the end of the class.

I was expecting it to be wet and cold for my catch up session with Duck yesterday morning, being, as it was, winter solstice. I don't think we've really had a winter yet to be honest. Instead it was calm and warm and, thankfully, dry. I expected Duck to take it easy on me but there wasn't much hope of that as we ran stair repeats, threw in some one-legged squats, and did a series of kettlebell drills. In the face of another workout this morning, I decided caution was the best strategy, and didn't follow that up with a run.

If I thought I'd been worked hard yesterday I had no idea what was going to hit me today. Duck has a male client who used to be in the army, and while he's older now and apparently a bit unfit, for some reason she thought it would be a good idea to put me through the same workout for time as she'd just done with him.

We started off with a few hill repeats. Both of us noticed that my leg lift and turnover are suddenly hugely improved. It seems sitting on the sofa for a week equaled rest and recovery rather than physical diminishment.

From there it was on to the main workout. It went like this:

Complete 1 squat with a 16kg kettlebell, then one pushup (on toes), then one kettlebell swing, then rest. Each round is a minute long, so you then rest till it's time to start again. The next round you do two reps, the next round 3 etc, until you can no longer complete the exercises within the allotted minute. In other words, you get less and less rest.

Duck's client managed ten rounds, dropping to his knees for the pushups after about six. I got to halfway through round 11 before dropping to my knees. At the end of round eleven Duck told me that one of the other Squad girls had completed thirteen rounds. By about eleven the squats turned into the origin of all that is nasty in this universe. I've never really felt like I've maxed out on squats, but I got pretty damn close today. To add to this, the remnants of my cold were revealing themselves as it got harder and harder to catch my breath. By the last round I sounded like an asthmatic as my lungs did their best to push through the air.

I ended up taking 1.10 to finish round thirteen, but then I also slowed the squats right down because we knew I probably wouldn't finish it, so it seemed to make more sense to do them well. I do think that if I could breathe properly I probably could have finished within the minute.

We followed that up with 10 of a move where you start in a plank then reach out as far as possible to touch the ground, alternating arms. That was followed by 10 medicine ball throwdowns, squatting to catch the ball, then 8 plank reach moves, then 10 medicine ball throwdowns, then 6 of the plank, then 10 of the ball, etc.

By the end of this workout I never wanted to do another squat ever again. I can honestly say that I have not felt this shattered by a workout in a long time. It seemed deceptively simple, and yet it was incredibly hard. There was no way I could have even entertained the idea of a run after that!

I know I worked hard because my appetite went insane afterwards. Thankfully I've been feasting on brown bean soup for lunch all week and it does an excellent job of filling me up. As I sit here I can tell that I am going to be rather sore tomorrow. My biceps are already sore and I couldn't work out why till I realised it was from holding the kettlebell up under my chin during the squats. My lats are not going to want to move at all tomorrow. My glutes are quietly crying and my hamstrings are shriveling. I can also feel my core starting to kick in. Ouch - and I just poked at my pecs and it seems they're a bit sensitive as well! Hmm ... come to think of it, so are my shoulders.

Tomorrow is a rest day, for which I am extremely grateful, and then it's back into the running and Balance on Saturday. I'm starting to set everything in place for my marathon programme, starting in a few weeks. I'm eating a lot cleaner after a slightly disastrous binge while I was sick. I'm going to get back into the regular yoga and I'm going to stretch more. I also know I need to start up regular massages again.

While I'm getting over a cold

Check out these beautiful photos (taken with my iPhone, so not the best quality) of my gym, Frank Kitts Park, at 7.15 one late May morning as I was waiting for my personal training session with Duck.

I love this sculpture - The Albatross.

Wellington Harbour, with the port to the far left.

Oriental Bay and Mt Victoria to the right.












So beautiful.

A bike ride

Hamish and I had originally planned to be in Central Otago for the first couple of weeks of April so I'd taken time off work. Unfortunately Hamish couldn't go (something about taking a month off later this year - bah), but I'd already booked mine so I found myself gifted with over two weeks in Wellington, with some surprisingly good weather.

One fine sunny morning I loaded up my car, stopped into work to print off a map, and headed over to Masterton to ride the Tour of the Wairarapa course. I decided on TotW because I've only ever done the 50k ride before. Several of the Gearshifters had complained that the 115k course was hard and hilly, but I was just generally curious to see what it was like. With sun, mild temperatures and no real wind forecast it seemed like a good time to give it a go.

I was of course a bit nervous about heading out all that distance on my own, especially when I knew it was likely there'd be no cellphone reception for much of it, and that there was no one handy should I need rescuing. I regarded it as a kind of personal challenge though, so sucked down another harden up pill.

By the time I got to Masterton it was already 11, so I took a little more Hydrocortisone, ate a banana, and got going. I didn't see another cyclist the whole time I was out there, and on the country roads there were hardly any cars. I was in this on my own.

The first 25k were familiar territory and went past fairly quickly. I stopped at the 50k ride turnaround point to have a bit of a drink and a bite to eat, and to psyche myself up. From here on in it was all unknown. I'd never even driven out that way before, so I had no idea what the roads were like or what the hills were like. I was just hoping I could stick to the map and not get lost.

After a bit of a climb I had a rather nerve racking descent on roads covered in wet pine needles. For the record - wet pine needles are not a good surface for cycling, especially with the race tires I've never bothered to change, which have very little tread. From there though I found myself in a lovely valley, surrounded by rolling green hills. I tucked down low over the handlebars and got into a zone, flying through this beautiful location on a deserted country road, feeling rather awesome.

The awesomeness lasted to about the intersection with Dagg Rd, where I suddenly hit a cold and surprisingly strong headwind, which I guess the valley must have been funneling. From there it was a mental battle to Alfredton, as I started to freak out just ever so slightly. I was so tempted to make it an out and back and go back the way I'd come, which would still have made for around a three hour ride, but I knew I'd be disappointed in myself if I did. I had to have faith that the headwind would turn to a tailwind and that I'd be ok.

Eventually I made it to Alfredton, which I'd suspected to be a little town but in fact was just a dot on the map. I got to an intersection and turned right, rode a few metres, stopped, looked at the map, turned around and went left. I nearly ended up riding way off course, but the left turn wasn't as obvious because the road narrowed, and turning right seemed more logical.

Unnerved ever so slightly I started to freak out even more as the wind grew rather than eased, and my average speed plummeted. For some reason I started to worry about getting back to Masterton before it got dark, even though it was hardly going to take me six hours to ride 115k. Sometimes when I'm riding I lose my ability to summon up rational thought! However I was going to get back late enough that it was going to be early evening before I made it back to Wellington.

Between Afredton and Eketahuna was probably the worst part of the ride. There were two fairly gnarly climbs which ordinarily wouldn't have bothered me, but on my own and not knowing how long they would go on for (or how steep they would get) they messed with my head. It was also obvious that there had been lots of stock on the road. If I thought descending over wet pine needles was bad it was just as well I didn't know ahead of time I'd be riding down steep, winding hills on roads covered in cow shit, into sneaky head and crosswinds. Mind you, I didn't expect to find a fallen pine tree blocking most of the road halfway up the second climb either. Thankfully there was just enough room to cycle around it.

At the bottom of the second hill I found myself in a narrow valley surrounded by more rolling hills, not knowing what I was going to have to do to climb back out again. I figured I had at least one more climb to get out and into Eketahuna and was feeling rather anxious about what that would entail. All that talk about there being nasty hills out this way had done a number on me. During the moments when the wind dropped though it was all very beautiful and scenic, and I did enjoy myself in between the moments of panic!

In the end the climb out was long but gradual and nothing much to be concerned about at all. It was, however, nasty chip seal. About halfway up there was a noise like my back tire deflating. I jumped off but both tires were fine. Nothing seemed obviously wrong but when I spun my back wheel there was a rasping sound like something rubbing. Eventually, after a few moments of nervous investigation, I located a piece of gravel sitting above the back brake. I couldn't get to it with my finger so fished out my car keys and after a few more moments of fiddling I managed to get it out.

That small moment of potential disaster lightened my mood for a while, but once I got to Eketahuna I was keen to keep moving and get this thing over with. All plans of a relaxed lunch in the sun went out the window. The next few kilometres were along the highway. Thankfully there was a bit of a shoulder because there were a lot of stock trucks and milk tankers whizzing past. Thankfully also I seemed to have a bit of a tailwind at last, and I fairly flew up another long, gentle incline and down the other side.

At Kaiparoro I turned left off the main road and into cycling heaven. With a true tailwind I soared along a narrow, gently undulating country road through trees and fields at around 35kph. No cars passed to destroy my zen. At one point I stopped for a farmer moving his sheep and he commented that it was a nice day for it before waving me through. I had another near-map malfunction but was undaunted, with victory in the air. I also started seeing signs pointing to Masterton. I was still expecting there to be a final climb before dropping down to Dyer's Rock, but I was no longer nervous.

Finally I got back to what I thought was the intersection that would take me back along the undulating 25k I'd rode at the start. I turned right and pedaled happily onwards, stopping once more briefly for sheep. After cycling along blissfully for some time (the late afternoon sun was turning all the autumn leaves even more golden) I realised something was amiss when I crossed railway lines. Damn - they weren't there before. Checking my map I discovered I'd gone right when I should have, you guessed it, gone left. Story of my day. However I also saw that if I kept going the way I was I would come back onto the highway at Opaki. I was, therefore, not majorly lost. I'd just taken a slight detour.

In the end the detour was a blessing in disguise as it lead to me taking a slightly faster, shorter route back down a long flat road. Still distrustful of my faulty navigation skills I stopped occasionally to check on my progress, but almost before I knew it I was in Masterton. I ended up riding just under 110k on my own, through unfamiliar territory, on my own. I'd only started to tire over about the last half an hour. My average speed was slow, but with no one to draft off it was a speed I was prepared to accept.

I finished off the last of my second Em's Power Bar, loaded up the car, stopped at a dairy for a drink, and drove happily back to Wellington, where Hamish organised dinner and I collapsed happily on the sofa with a bottle of cider. I'd just done something I would never have thought I'd be brave enough to do, and I was thrilled.

More milestones!

First, a duathlon report. This duathlon was the first event I ever did, the event that started everything. It's a women's event, 3.5k run/walk, 10k bike, 1.5k run/walk. The first time I did it it took me 59 minutes and I was ecstatic to do it under an hour. The second time it took me 57 minutes.

This time I was ambitious and set a goal of 50 minutes. The event had moved to another location a few more kilometres round the waterfront. This meant that the bike course was two loops of a 5k circuit, and that the second run was ever so slightly undulating. I decided I'd push for a sub-5 minute pace on the run, but knew I'd easily average over 24kmph on the bike, which would give me a little additional cushioning. The two transitions would eat up some time due to the fact I needed to change shoes and didn't have Yanks laces on my running shoes.

Of course everything hinged on the weather. Saturday, the day of registration, was completely calm and sunny. Sunday was overcast and by the time we got out on the bike course there was enough of a headwind to be a nuisance. So how did it go?

One of the things I wanted to make sure I did this time was a warm up. I knew I wanted to start out fast and I had to warm up to do that. I got to the start extremely early, parking a short walk away. It was coolish but I decided I could get away with my event t-shirt and arm warmers with my trishorts. I checked on my bike then had a little bit of a jog around. I did some drills and finished up with a few short sprints up the first bit of Rata St. At transition I was set up next to a woman who I knew does the Scorching Triathlons. She's very tall, slender and athletic so I decided if I could I would try to stick with her. Unfortunately when we were lining up the marshalls put her wave behind me.

I entered the race late so was one of the last to start. My number was 411 and we were started in waves of 50 one minute apart. I stood at the front and when the starting gun went I just went for it. Duck had asked me earlier that week if I'd ever gone so hard in an event I just couldn't go any more. Of course I never had so I had it in my head that I should at least try, just for a change. If I failed I'd be the only one who knew.

I maintained a sub-5 pace for most of the first run, which really pleased me. I had to run on the road for most of it to get around everyone I was overtaking, but thankfully the road was closed and no one was out on their bike at that point. About a kilometre into the run my Scorching Tri rabbit went flying past me and, as hard as I planned on going, I knew there was no way I could follow. That woman was fast! However she was the only person to overtake me on the first run.

I lost time in transition undoing my laces but it gave me a little time to catch my breath before the bike. I'd tied my timing chip round my ankle with some ribbon so at least didn't need to worry about that. I wasn't sure whether they'd have timing mats at transition but it turned out that they didn't, so in the end it wouldn't have mattered if I hadn't transferred the chip to my cycling shoes, but it was one less thing to think about.

Before long i was out on the bike. I didn't look to see what my bike average was but it was of course easily over 24kmph. Even with the headwind on the way out to Balaena Bay (which was disappointingly strong) didn't slow me that much, and I was sitting on well over 30 with a tail wind. No one overtook me and I think I would have gone faster if there had been someone to chase. Instead I just got down on the drops and concentrated on my cadence (and not running over the photographer standing in the middle of the road on the corner).

The two lap bike leg was a PITA as it meant three turn arounds and I had to go really slowly to account for all the other cyclists (many of whom were beginners and not very confident). The slow turns really affected my average speed. When I got back to transition the marshalls failed to point us towards the entrance back in. One said to go straight ahead and I thought 'huh, that's odd' but thought perhaps we had to cycle a little bit further and turn around again but when I set out he then yelled out after me so I had to turn around and go back again. I was extremely frustrated and suggested a little brusquely that the marshalls might actually want to marshall. It was nice to get into transition though and to see it still full of bikes! My Scorching Tri rabbit was the only bike nearby which was gone when I got back.

The last 1.5k included the tiniest little bit of a hill, but I really felt it. I just had to keep repeating '1.5k, you can do anything for 1.5k'. The turnaround came very soon but I soon realised that was because we had to run round the back of Cog Park on the gravel path so going back was a lot longer. I tried really hard to keep myself motivated to go hard, but I just couldn't, even as I saw my 50 minute goal ticking by. Mind you, when I looked down at the Garmin I was still not far off target pace so I guess I can't have been that bad.

So that was that. I did the event in just under 52 minutes, and I call that a success, especially given time lost in transition and due to the bike stuff up. Although the results weren't sent out by placing a rough count indicated that I was somewhere around 20th, which I will take. It's probably the highest placing I'll ever get.

Given that my car was parked so close I went back there, dropped off my helmet and shoes and picked up some warm clothes then stood at the finish line cheering people in. I grabbed my bike out of transition before prize giving because it was by far the nicest bike there and no one was checking that the people taking bikes out were actually their owners. The prize giving was thankfully short. There were some great prizes and some slightly dud ones (Powerbands!) but I didn't win any of them. I went home still feeling fresh, like I could have done a longer event. Hamish cooked pancakes and then I spent the rest of the day just keeping warm and hanging out.

That's enough for one post. Coming up next - Pip goes crazy in the Wairarapa, otherwise known as Pip cycles 110k on her own and barely manages to not get lost.

It's been a big weekend

I haven't been posting much here sorry. The last few months have been full of happenings, but I haven't been able to find the words to describe them. Since the aftermath of the surgery I've been a lot more pragmatic about a lot of things. If something doesn't work out then it just doesn't. If something good happens, then it happens. I'm not so quick to believe in miracles, nor to look for some great purpose in life. I just get on and do what I can. I've learned to choose my battles, or rather to choose what is important to me and not stress myself out about the things I feel I 'should' be doing because everyone else is. This is my life and it's pretty damn good as it is.

Lately, however, the 'what I can' has been increasing in its greatness. I'll recount the last nine days' training as an example. Last weekend we were in Tauranga for a wedding. I woke up early on Saturday to torrential rain, but go up and jogged my way soggily round the estuary, exploring a scenic trail and particularly lovely boardwalk. 12km done.

I had Monday off and fortuitously, back in Wellington, was greeted with a stunning day. I got up, got on my bike, and cycled for 80km. Despite always having been nervous of cycling Makara on my own, I went out there and did it. I didn't get a flat tire, I didn't get stuck out in the middle of nowhere with no cellphone reception, I didn't get lost in Johnsonville, or any of the other horrors of my worst imaginings. Instead I tootled my way through the gorge then back to town via Ngaio Gorge. Still feeling good I kept on going around the Bays, then back up Happy Valley to home. 80km on my own! Believe me, this was momentous.

After that little effort I didn't feel up to a squad run that night. I had a Wild Workouts session the next morning, and Duck warned me we had a hard run on Wednesday night so she didn't want me to do anything else so as to ensure my legs were fresh. It was hard not to do my usual RPM, but I managed it. It was just as well because Wednesday night's run turned out to be a 5k time trial.

I haven't run a timed 5k since my 24.24 PB back at the start of marathon training a few years back. Needless to say I was not in the mood to try again today. I flew out way too fast and was on track to equal that, but I'm heavier and slower these days and faded on the way back, having to employ every possible mental trick to get me to the end. So not sub-25, but at least I have a baseline now and something to work on.

I had another Duck session on Thursday morning and she went easy on my legs, then after work I set off to do the workout I'd missed on Monday night. I jogged up to Drummond St in Berhampore, and there before me stood a flight of steps that looked like some Mayan ruin. The Drummond Street steps are a newly-laid tower that goes straight up before you like a cruel joke. I can't find an image online so you'll just have to take my word for it! Someone said there are around 100 steps, but I didn't take the time to count.

I stopped at the bottom of the steps to get my breath. My instructions were to repeat the steps up to ten times within 23 minutes. I was aiming for seven, as some of our group had only made eight and I figured I'd be slower on my own. However I found I was recovering enough on the way down that I didn't need to take the full one minute break Duck had recommended, and managed ten repeats in 22.30. I triumphed over the stairs of doom!

Unfortunately I also had a full weekend planned, and the aim of ensuring my legs were fresh for it wasn't exactly achieved. After the stair repeats my calves were like rocks. Walking down the Farmers Lane stairs to catch the bus after work on Friday had me wincing. They were still tight when I woke on Saturday morning to meet the squad at Eastbourne for a 70 minute run. Thankfully Duck knew most of us were running Xterra the next day, so she kept it flat. We set out towards Pencarrow. It was cold at the start but running warmed us up and it was so incredibly beautiful that it was an absolute pleasure to be out there. The photo at the start of this blog is from that day. Wellington - cloudless, still, the harbour mirror calm. I love this city.

The other girls went out quite hard at the start but I wanted to settle into a long run pace so stuck to six minute kilometres. My legs were still tight but my calves could cope with the flat so I just cruised along in my little happy place. Scores of other runners and cyclists were out enjoying the conditions and the flat, well-graded gravel road. With squad runners ahead of and behind me I focused on enjoying the beautiful scenery as cargo ships and ferries sailed past nearby.

I turned as ordered at 35 minutes and cruised back again, only really starting to tire slightly at the 60 minute mark, but still maintaining my pace and achieving an almost perfect split. We celebrated with coffee at Chocolate Dayz cafe before I headed off home for a big bowl of pasta and cider.

I knew that I was not going to be feeling fresh for the first of this winter's Xterra Trail series. Despite the end of daylight savings giving me an extra hour's sleep I still woke at the old 6.30 and lay there more or less sleeplessly for the next hour. The forecast was for drizzle but our luck seemed to be holding and, even though it was again cold, it was dry. The Northerly had of course risen as predicted. I was at registration not long after 7.30, and scored a park on the road not far from the Makara Park mountainbike park, where the race started. I had my photo taken by the Xterra crowd with other random racers, and eventually we were off.

Here's where I had to take my harden-up pills. The medium course was supposed to be 10-12k, but the organisers weren't happy with the course, so had changed it, meaning we were now to run 14. I didn't know whether I was up to running 14k on my tired legs, but I wanted to run more than 6.5, which is what the short coursers were doing. In the end I decided I'd start with the medium distancers and take the short course turnoff if I didn't great when the time came.

Off we went, and I soon decided that if I didn't blow out and kept my pace comfortable I should be ok for the medium distance. However the short course people were only five minutes behind us so I spent a bit of time dodging out of their faster runners' way. Eventually I found a nice quiet little spot with no other runners around me (which in reality, I think means I was last) and just got on with enjoying the beautiful trail.

The first few kilometres were undulating to slightly uphill, and it was only after four kilometres that we hit a real steep section of the track that I walked a bit of. From there the course went downhill a little, then up again. When we broke out onto a four wheel drive track I could see the Peak way off to my right. It seemed like an incredibly long way away. I took a harden up pill in the form of a gummy lolly and kept going. By this point I was being passed by long coursers, but do you think I cared? I think I have finally given up caring about being slow!

Despite my misgivings it actually didn't take that long to get up to the Peak, via a series of switchbacks which took the sting out of the climb. Up at the top it was really windy. We turned along an extremely exposed ridge, and between the quite technical trail (narrow and lots of rocky downhill surfaces to gingerly lower myself down) and the wind, it was a struggle to keep upright. At one point I nearly did get blown off the side of the hill, but somehow managed to keep my feet.

I was a little bit disappointed that the downhill was so technical, as I had to take it extremely slowly. It's really only on the downhill that the remnants of my vestibular issues come to light, as I find it difficult to accurately judge the depth of the descent, plus everything tends to bounce around in front of my face. However, as I said above, I'd long since given up worrying about being slow. Eventually we came out on an easier trail, and from then it was a fairly fast, undulating-trending downwards four kilometres back to the car park. I was being overtaken by lots of long-course runners, all of whom commented on how great the trail was, and I absolutely had to agree.

Finishing was great as, about 500 metres out, there was a break in the treeline and the squad, waiting at the finishline, spotted me and started cheering. Just before the final turn there was another group of spectators who also knew me, so they were cheering me as well. All I could hear was 'go Pip'! I felt like a rockstar and came over the finishline with the biggest grin ever. All I could say was "that was awesome"!

And indeed it was awesome. A year ago I was walk-running the short course and today, even though I doubted I had it in me to go the distance, I finished a fairly tough medium. So, as I said at the start, what I've been achieving has been, relatively speaking, rising in greatness. I am getting there on my own terms, and at the moment that's exactly the way I like it.

The Highlights

Run for Christchurch has raised over $18,ooo. We went global and people were amazing. Check out our blog for more details. If you've ever been curious to hear me speak then you can listen to my podcast there as well!

Work has finally quietened down again and it's pretty much back to Business As Usual instead of earthquake recovery. I actually had performance review interviews with my team, though I haven't written up the reports yet. I'm in the middle of writing a project plan, about which I'm ridiculously excited.

Hamish and I are off away again up the island this weekend for a wedding. It's normal to immediately start planning new running and cycling routes, right?

This week I completed a monster (as in insanely steep) 1.5 hour trail run on Saturday and rode a solo 40k on Sunday (I was supposed to do around 70 but ended up riding on my own and lost my will to live). On Monday the Squad mixed it up a bit with a run around Mt Victoria and Newtown - a mix of trails and road. I ended up on my own after trying to find some tail-enders who'd gone another way and had to sprint back to Te Papa to make sure someone didn't send out a search party.

On Tuesday Duck's morning workouts started up again. Lots of squats, lunges, pushups, step ups and tricep dips later we were done. I followed that up with an RPM class after work.

On Wednesday it was 1k interval time. We warmed up then did four intervals. I did surprisingly well for the first two but my post-workout/RPM legs weren't really having it for the last.

This morning it was time for a one-on-one Duck bashing in Frank Kitts, the highlight of which was me skidding on the slippery surface of the playground while doing side shuttles. My right leg went one way, my left went the other, and in an attempt to not rupture an abductor I found myself on my back laughing hysterically while people walked by. I am still loving the kettlebell work we've been doing and am feeling very strong.

This afternoon the autumnal weather was perfect for running. It was clear, calm and wind free. I headed out at lunchtime for a bonus 5k up to Kelburn and back through the Botanical Gardens. My legs were tired but did their thing obligingly.

Oh, and I have a new marathon training programme!!!

Getting away from things by cycling

I've been sadly neglecting this blog. There have been rides and runs. There has been a lot of thinking about life and uncertainty, and getting to grips with that. I've been feeling a lot more grounded. So it was a shock on Tuesday to get back from a meeting to hear that there had been a huge aftershock in Christchurch. It was quickly clear that this time there would be a death toll.

H and I are lucky. We have no immediate family in Christchurch, but we do have extended family, all of whom are, as far as we know, ok. For a few days I thought a friend may have been in Christchurch when the quake hit, but she was located on Thursday in Abel Tasman. Hamish's parent company's office is a write-off, and they have a container-load of stock on the port which they'd been waiting for since the last quake. They have no idea whether it has survived. I've spent the week dealing with business continuity stuff as our own Christchurch office is out of action. Still, it's been hard to know what to do to help.

So when a friend asked me to help organise a virtual charity run I was eager to help out. Since then things have gone viral. We're getting blogger coverage around the world, we've been on National Radio, and events are being organised everywhere. On day two we're already past our fundraising target.

By this morning it was all getting a bit overwhelming and I needed to think about something else for a while. I drove out to Upper Hutt and went for a ride.

We rode from Upper Hutt over the Blue Mountains (which were steep and sweaty), down through Whiteman's Valley and Mangaroa, over the hill, up over Wallaceville, back through Mangaroa again, and then headed back to the town centre again.

It was a perfect day for cycling - not too cool, not too hot, very little wind. I didn't feel fabulous on the hills but the others thought I looked strong. We were flying on the flat without too much effort.


Sometimes the best way to deal with a traumatic event, and to build yourself up before diving back in again to continue helping, is to spend some time cycling with friends in the beautiful outdoors.